Ok took a little longer than planned but here we go with the rest of the squads at the party
Group E
Holland - the Dutch have a great chance with a strong squad this year if they can avoid their usual trap of fighting and squabbling with each other. The ol man Arjen Robben (ok he's like 25 but looks about 50) has been on flying form and if he can get fit will play a big part. Likewise Robin van Persie should be coming back fresh having missed so much of the season at Arsenal and Wesley Sneijder has been running the show at Inter. Expect them to stick to the pattern tho', amazing in their group games and looking like surefire champs followed by limp elimination in the second round.
Denmark the Danish will look to the second round as the target goal and should be in good shape to get there. But expect goal scoring to be the weak point with the hardly inspiring Bendtner leading the line.
Japan bound for noble failure the Japanese side will be full of running but a lack of experience against more worldly opponents will be their downfall. A good J-pop track or two is probably the best that could be expected of them. Nice shirt though.
Cameroon the 'Indomitable Lions' are somewhat like an international Bolton side. Big, strong but not very pretty or too concerned with making the play look nice. The have a shot at the second round as they will no doubt manage to out muscle the Japanese and then it's down to their game against Denmark as to who goes on most likely.
Group F
Italy the current world champions do no look like a side capable of holding onto their crown. They do not have really any players who are likely to really be able to turn a game and warhorses like Gattuso are starting to run out of time and energy at this level. But once again we can marvel at how efficiently and expertly an Italian side can break up the flow of a game it's doing well in to stifle the opponent and you never know we might once again get a display of expert sledging even without Marco playing.
Paraguay confess I don't recognise a single name on their teamsheet apart from Roque Santa Cruz who has spent the last year at Man City polishing the seats on the bench with his backside. So really no idea what they'll be like, but that's half the fun of the whole thing
New Zealand again not much I can tell you beyond they will be happy to take part and will quite probably go home without a point.
Slovkia complete the group of question marks on teams I don't know much about (& Italy), word on the wind appears to favour them for a least a 2nd round berth.
Group G
Brazil are first up in this year's "Group Of Death" and will obviously be one of the favourites of the competition as they always are. These days they play with slightly less flair under Dunga and a bit more pragmatism. Still it seems Robinho has decided to be interested now he's out of Manchester, Maicon is as good a full back as you'll see and Kaka could you fulfil his early promise. No-one will want to meet them in the knock out stages.
North Korea Poor north Korea in the worst possible group they could have drawn. They are just going to be bulldozed by the others.
Ivory Coast hope beyond hope that Drogba is fit as he is the main man without question but they may not be stuck without as they do have a strong looking side with the Toure brothers and Chelsea's Kalou in the mix. Plus an old schemer in the form Sven in the coach's seat. I actually expect them to progress into the second round ahead of Portugal
Portugal When you play Portugal you'll either be beaten by Christiano Ronaldo or you won't be beaten. Yes, the Portuguese have the honour of being the team most reliant on one man to get anywhere this summer. Look beyond him and it's a side of uninspiring faces and an ageing Deco. Can the smug one carry the side to glory? Personally I don't think so.
Group H
Spain should be champions. The current European Champions won that prize at a canter. Blessed with a midfield stuffed full of world class players (the frankly brilliant Fabregas isn't good enough to get a game here) and a pair of strikers who just deadly in Torres and Villa. The only suspect aspect to the side is their defence but since opponents are unlikely to actually get a touch of the ball it doesn't really seem important.
Switzerland the Swiss are another solid but really that exciting team who will hope that good organisation and patient play will seen them get results against the South Americans in the group for progress into the knock out stages.
Honduras /Chile - I'll do these two together since it's once more teams I know nothing about and so couldn't really tell you anything about them. So there's at least one game in the group that will be a complete mystery!
So there you go that rounds up the rest of the sides taking part.
Showing posts with label World Cup. Show all posts
Showing posts with label World Cup. Show all posts
Friday, 11 June 2010
Tuesday, 8 June 2010
World Cup Blaggers guide; Them other teams
Well I guess we better say a little about the other 31 nations taking part in this here festival of football. I think for ease of me remembering who is there we'll take it group by group.
Group A
South Africa - the hosts will be full of enthusiasm but weary of being the first host nation to fail to reach the knock stages in what should be a tightly contested group. Everton's Steven Pienaar is their most recognisable and probable best player. Expect lots of vaguely condescending commentary on their efforts and a lot of noise from the local fans. In with a good shout of making the top two.
Mexico - perennial turnouts Mexico typically turn up look disappointing and then go home. Their best player in this country is Carlos Vela who currently can't get a game for Arsenal ahead of Nicholas Bendtner (who is rubbish.) Will quickly fade away and hopefully be remembered for at least embarrassing the French
Uruguay - amusing names aside a team with a few useful players, notable Diego Forlan who used to look terrible upon terrible playing in this country but has since gone to remember he's actually a goal machine. Will via for progress with South African and France.
France - first all remember the French are only here because they cheated the Irish out of it. Then remember coach Raymond Domench picks his teams using astrology, and this is quite possibly why they have been terrible for the last two years or so. With luck they'll crash out in the groups, with more luck they'll go out later but in a blaze of flying headbutts as they seek to relive 2006's "glory". Ah, poor old ZZ.
Group B
Argentina - coached by the crazy, wild eyed national icon that is Maradona Argentina have a lot of very good players. The trouble is half of them aren't going because they haven't been picked. Lionel Messi is currently in brilliant form and is quite possibly the best player in the world at the moment. Expect him to have the holy crap kicked out of him at every opportunity by the opponents. Carlos Tevez is also quite popular in parts of Manchester and is the closet you'll see to an excited dog chasing the ball around on the pitch this summer.
Nigeria - one of the strongest African teams if rather uninspiring, some recognisable faces in there but will feel a bit like the newly promoted championship side trying to find it's Premiership way - i.e one or two surprising results but ultimately going home rather deflated.
Korea Republic - plucky underdogs who will do well to get a point away from home turf, but will undoubtedly do a lot better than their neighbours with whom they get on so well.
Greece - industrious but presumably all being paid with 'I.O.U's. Another dull but effective team making group B the least attractive of all groups to watch. May squeeze through to the next round but I wouldn't expect much more than that.
Group C
England - these guys we know about.
USA - ever improving but not as good as FIFA's confused ranking system makes them look. Clint Dempsey and Landon Donovan will be the danger men and are indeed useful players, the rest however are decent but nothing special. Remember to mock the popularity of 'soccer' in the States and just look at the needlessly 'trendy' team shield to comprehend the tackiness of American culture. Should finish 2ND to England in this group though. If fate has a sense of humour they'll somehow end up playing North Korea.
Algeria are just happy to be involved and will take anything they can get. Their best player has been playing for the terminally doomed Portsmouth this year, which currently says it all and even in that bunch Hassan Yebda looked a bit rubbish .
Slovenia - another side happy to at the party and I'll admit I don't know anything about of them. Expect them to go home early though and perhaps for some of them to get signed by the likes of Bolton and West Brom for next season.
Group D
Germany - the Germans always do well at these things, so expect an efficient second round place at the least (where they could meet England), penalty scoring prowess and team made of Swiss and Polish born players. Important central figure and captain Micheal Ballack has been ruled out by injury but Phillip Lahm and Bastian Schweinstegier are a pair of excellent players. But a crucial lack of firepower should them eliminated before the semi finals.
Australia - team Kangaroo will hope to make the 2nd round and do stand a half decent chance although the team is aging and reliant on Harry Kewell being fit and probably also Mark Schwarzer making a lot of saves. Will be the most friendly bunch of guys out there but football is one sport at which the cork hats aren't that good. Also may be distracted by watching cricket instead of training.
Serbia - another team about which I'll admit I know little but the buzz and word of mouth suggests they are a fairly good outfit and will be expecting to progress past the group stages and that's really all I can say about 'em.
Ghana - a good group of players (including John Mensah who impressed me very much playing for Sunderland this year but don't know how much that says) but with possibly a bit of shortfall in terms of the goal scoring department. Hard to say if they'll make the next round in a tight group but playing in Africa will see them receive great support which might be the tell tale factor.
Right that's halfway for now, I'll do and update with the rest of the groups tomorrow.
Group A
South Africa - the hosts will be full of enthusiasm but weary of being the first host nation to fail to reach the knock stages in what should be a tightly contested group. Everton's Steven Pienaar is their most recognisable and probable best player. Expect lots of vaguely condescending commentary on their efforts and a lot of noise from the local fans. In with a good shout of making the top two.
Mexico - perennial turnouts Mexico typically turn up look disappointing and then go home. Their best player in this country is Carlos Vela who currently can't get a game for Arsenal ahead of Nicholas Bendtner (who is rubbish.) Will quickly fade away and hopefully be remembered for at least embarrassing the French
Uruguay - amusing names aside a team with a few useful players, notable Diego Forlan who used to look terrible upon terrible playing in this country but has since gone to remember he's actually a goal machine. Will via for progress with South African and France.
France - first all remember the French are only here because they cheated the Irish out of it. Then remember coach Raymond Domench picks his teams using astrology, and this is quite possibly why they have been terrible for the last two years or so. With luck they'll crash out in the groups, with more luck they'll go out later but in a blaze of flying headbutts as they seek to relive 2006's "glory". Ah, poor old ZZ.
Group B
Argentina - coached by the crazy, wild eyed national icon that is Maradona Argentina have a lot of very good players. The trouble is half of them aren't going because they haven't been picked. Lionel Messi is currently in brilliant form and is quite possibly the best player in the world at the moment. Expect him to have the holy crap kicked out of him at every opportunity by the opponents. Carlos Tevez is also quite popular in parts of Manchester and is the closet you'll see to an excited dog chasing the ball around on the pitch this summer.
Nigeria - one of the strongest African teams if rather uninspiring, some recognisable faces in there but will feel a bit like the newly promoted championship side trying to find it's Premiership way - i.e one or two surprising results but ultimately going home rather deflated.
Korea Republic - plucky underdogs who will do well to get a point away from home turf, but will undoubtedly do a lot better than their neighbours with whom they get on so well.
Greece - industrious but presumably all being paid with 'I.O.U's. Another dull but effective team making group B the least attractive of all groups to watch. May squeeze through to the next round but I wouldn't expect much more than that.
Group C
England - these guys we know about.
USA - ever improving but not as good as FIFA's confused ranking system makes them look. Clint Dempsey and Landon Donovan will be the danger men and are indeed useful players, the rest however are decent but nothing special. Remember to mock the popularity of 'soccer' in the States and just look at the needlessly 'trendy' team shield to comprehend the tackiness of American culture. Should finish 2ND to England in this group though. If fate has a sense of humour they'll somehow end up playing North Korea.
Algeria are just happy to be involved and will take anything they can get. Their best player has been playing for the terminally doomed Portsmouth this year, which currently says it all and even in that bunch Hassan Yebda looked a bit rubbish .
Slovenia - another side happy to at the party and I'll admit I don't know anything about of them. Expect them to go home early though and perhaps for some of them to get signed by the likes of Bolton and West Brom for next season.
Group D
Germany - the Germans always do well at these things, so expect an efficient second round place at the least (where they could meet England), penalty scoring prowess and team made of Swiss and Polish born players. Important central figure and captain Micheal Ballack has been ruled out by injury but Phillip Lahm and Bastian Schweinstegier are a pair of excellent players. But a crucial lack of firepower should them eliminated before the semi finals.
Australia - team Kangaroo will hope to make the 2nd round and do stand a half decent chance although the team is aging and reliant on Harry Kewell being fit and probably also Mark Schwarzer making a lot of saves. Will be the most friendly bunch of guys out there but football is one sport at which the cork hats aren't that good. Also may be distracted by watching cricket instead of training.
Serbia - another team about which I'll admit I know little but the buzz and word of mouth suggests they are a fairly good outfit and will be expecting to progress past the group stages and that's really all I can say about 'em.
Ghana - a good group of players (including John Mensah who impressed me very much playing for Sunderland this year but don't know how much that says) but with possibly a bit of shortfall in terms of the goal scoring department. Hard to say if they'll make the next round in a tight group but playing in Africa will see them receive great support which might be the tell tale factor.
Right that's halfway for now, I'll do and update with the rest of the groups tomorrow.
Sunday, 6 June 2010
You wouldn't think it could be done..
But someone has managed to combine Star Wars, Daft Punk, Snoop Dogg, David Beckham, Noel Gallagher and football into one video. Awesome. (Even's with Beckham's shoddy acting)
Thursday, 3 June 2010
World Cup; The real basics
So as requested a quick run down of the brass tacks you need when watching football, with a look at the positions, formations and a quick jargon guide.
The Positions.
Perhaps the biggest area of jargon in the game is the description of where a player, well plays on the field. So lets go through a quick run down;
Goalkeeper (GK) - Pretty obvious this one, the chap that wears gloves and guards the goal. Allowed to handle the ball within the Penalty area (often referred to as the area) except when it's returned to him in a controlled manner by a teammate (though he can still handle the ball if said pass back was a header..still with us?)
A vital member of the team who can effectively win or lose a game single handed depending on his performance. Most squads will take three 'keepers to protect against injury and suspension apart from the sneaky North Koreans.
Center Back (CB) - Basically the heart of defense, a position in the center of the team's defensive line up . Commonly there will be two of these playing at a time in most sides but certain formations can feature three. These guys will be big, strong and not adverse to being a little rough (see the Italians for a masterclass in fouling the hell out of the opponent and getting away with it). Their main priority is to act as a wall against opponents but will occasionally stray upfield to add height to attacking set pieces.
Sweeper (SW) - A position you don't see that often but basically it is that same as the center back in terms of responsibility but set out to play just behind a pair of center backs. I.e he is there to sweep up if those in front of him make a mess of it.
Full back/Wing back (FB/WB)- These guys operate on the sides of the defense and will be looking to prevent opponents from putting it crosses or cutting in from the flanks. A full back will play most of the game as a defender, a wing back is essentially the same position but advanced a little further up the field. Players here are likely to be quick on their feet and good tacklers, not as bullish as the Center backs.
Midfied (MF)- The midfield is the group of players between the defensive line and the attacking line and features a number of variations. For example you can have a 'holding midfielder' whose main responsibility is too help out the defensive by playing just in front of them and making life hard for opponents, winning the ball and playing it simply to the more creative players on his side. Likewise an 'attacking midfielder' will play just behind his team's forwards and look to help them out by either helping to create space or making runs into the opponents penalty area.
Winger (W) - Part of the midfield and but these days you don't see too many out and out 'wingers' (for example David Beckham played most of his career on the right of midfield but would not be described as a winger). A winger plays on either the right or left of the field, he will look to remain close to the touchline on his side and as an attacking player his job is to try and get to the byline (the far end of the pitch) to put in a cross or create a chance at goal.
Center Forward (CF) - A center forward plays at the attacking front end of a team. Looking to score goals primarily but also there to hold up the ball and bring teammates into the play. Likely to be quite a physical presence, Rooney will be seen as one of these.
Striker (ST) - Plays in the same area of the field as the Center Forward with pretty much the same job but doing it in a slightly different way. A striker is looking to score goals first and foremost. He will play off a partner center forward but will look to shot at goal far more than he will look to play in a team mate. Strikers tend to be quick and sharp on the turn and are as happy scoring off their backsides right on the goalline as they are burying twenty yard pile drivers into the top corner.
So that's the basic set of positions of the football field, you will of course get variations but everything is pretty much a derivation of one of the above.
Formations
Now I was going to write all about formations but when looking for visual representations (the 'ol chalk boards) I found a site that goes through the basics of the most common ones so I'll link to that instead. 4-4-2 and the like.
Jargon.
Ok now a quick look at some of the common bits and pieces of jargon and phrases you'll hear.
"Set piece" - an attacking play from a dead ball situation, ie. a corner or a free kick. Teams will commonly work on their set piece play both in terms of defense and attack.
"Goals" - what some commentators call the goal when referring, because they are idiots. EG; "That one came close to the goals"
"Injury time" - the time added on at the end of a half for stoppages during play. Deciding by the ref and relayed by the fourth official on the touchline. Managers will frequently argue about how long is played and why. Typically about three or four minutes unless there's been a massive punch up or something.
"In the hole" - A phrase used to describe a position of play, it refers to a midfield player that plays behind a forward player in advance of the rest of the midfield. He is playing 'in the hole' between attack and midfield, defenses often struggle against people playing here for some reason.
"Man marking"/"Zonal marking" - the two types of defending at set plays. In man marking each defending player is assigned to defend against a specific opponent in a zonal system the defenders will look to defend an area (such as the six yard box)
"Push up" - this is when the defensive line of a team is looking to play as high up the picth as it can, increasing the chances of an opponent being offside.
"Long ball" - basically to pump the ball up and over the top of the midfield. None of this fancy dan passing it around nonsense. Boot it upfield and chase it.
"cross" - To plat the ball across the field into or through the opposition penalty area
"Byline" - The line marking the end of the pitch at the far ends.
"Touch line" - The line marking the sides of the pitch.
Well I hope that helps and next up it will be a look at all those crazy foreigners who also taking part. Any questions on the above or any other jargon just ask!
The Positions.
Perhaps the biggest area of jargon in the game is the description of where a player, well plays on the field. So lets go through a quick run down;
Goalkeeper (GK) - Pretty obvious this one, the chap that wears gloves and guards the goal. Allowed to handle the ball within the Penalty area (often referred to as the area) except when it's returned to him in a controlled manner by a teammate (though he can still handle the ball if said pass back was a header..still with us?)
A vital member of the team who can effectively win or lose a game single handed depending on his performance. Most squads will take three 'keepers to protect against injury and suspension apart from the sneaky North Koreans.
Center Back (CB) - Basically the heart of defense, a position in the center of the team's defensive line up . Commonly there will be two of these playing at a time in most sides but certain formations can feature three. These guys will be big, strong and not adverse to being a little rough (see the Italians for a masterclass in fouling the hell out of the opponent and getting away with it). Their main priority is to act as a wall against opponents but will occasionally stray upfield to add height to attacking set pieces.
Sweeper (SW) - A position you don't see that often but basically it is that same as the center back in terms of responsibility but set out to play just behind a pair of center backs. I.e he is there to sweep up if those in front of him make a mess of it.
Full back/Wing back (FB/WB)- These guys operate on the sides of the defense and will be looking to prevent opponents from putting it crosses or cutting in from the flanks. A full back will play most of the game as a defender, a wing back is essentially the same position but advanced a little further up the field. Players here are likely to be quick on their feet and good tacklers, not as bullish as the Center backs.
Midfied (MF)- The midfield is the group of players between the defensive line and the attacking line and features a number of variations. For example you can have a 'holding midfielder' whose main responsibility is too help out the defensive by playing just in front of them and making life hard for opponents, winning the ball and playing it simply to the more creative players on his side. Likewise an 'attacking midfielder' will play just behind his team's forwards and look to help them out by either helping to create space or making runs into the opponents penalty area.
Winger (W) - Part of the midfield and but these days you don't see too many out and out 'wingers' (for example David Beckham played most of his career on the right of midfield but would not be described as a winger). A winger plays on either the right or left of the field, he will look to remain close to the touchline on his side and as an attacking player his job is to try and get to the byline (the far end of the pitch) to put in a cross or create a chance at goal.
Center Forward (CF) - A center forward plays at the attacking front end of a team. Looking to score goals primarily but also there to hold up the ball and bring teammates into the play. Likely to be quite a physical presence, Rooney will be seen as one of these.
Striker (ST) - Plays in the same area of the field as the Center Forward with pretty much the same job but doing it in a slightly different way. A striker is looking to score goals first and foremost. He will play off a partner center forward but will look to shot at goal far more than he will look to play in a team mate. Strikers tend to be quick and sharp on the turn and are as happy scoring off their backsides right on the goalline as they are burying twenty yard pile drivers into the top corner.
So that's the basic set of positions of the football field, you will of course get variations but everything is pretty much a derivation of one of the above.
Formations
Now I was going to write all about formations but when looking for visual representations (the 'ol chalk boards) I found a site that goes through the basics of the most common ones so I'll link to that instead. 4-4-2 and the like.
Jargon.
Ok now a quick look at some of the common bits and pieces of jargon and phrases you'll hear.
"Set piece" - an attacking play from a dead ball situation, ie. a corner or a free kick. Teams will commonly work on their set piece play both in terms of defense and attack.
"Goals" - what some commentators call the goal when referring, because they are idiots. EG; "That one came close to the goals"
"Injury time" - the time added on at the end of a half for stoppages during play. Deciding by the ref and relayed by the fourth official on the touchline. Managers will frequently argue about how long is played and why. Typically about three or four minutes unless there's been a massive punch up or something.
"In the hole" - A phrase used to describe a position of play, it refers to a midfield player that plays behind a forward player in advance of the rest of the midfield. He is playing 'in the hole' between attack and midfield, defenses often struggle against people playing here for some reason.
"Man marking"/"Zonal marking" - the two types of defending at set plays. In man marking each defending player is assigned to defend against a specific opponent in a zonal system the defenders will look to defend an area (such as the six yard box)
"Push up" - this is when the defensive line of a team is looking to play as high up the picth as it can, increasing the chances of an opponent being offside.
"Long ball" - basically to pump the ball up and over the top of the midfield. None of this fancy dan passing it around nonsense. Boot it upfield and chase it.
"cross" - To plat the ball across the field into or through the opposition penalty area
"Byline" - The line marking the end of the pitch at the far ends.
"Touch line" - The line marking the sides of the pitch.
Well I hope that helps and next up it will be a look at all those crazy foreigners who also taking part. Any questions on the above or any other jargon just ask!
Monday, 31 May 2010
The World Cup Blaggers Guide Part One; Basics and England
Right the so the world's biggest sporting event is nearly upon us (more people will watch this than the Olympics) and I'm aware that some of you out there will be left struggling to really comment and starting to feel like the uncool left in the corner. At least during the Olympics hardly anyone knows that much about what is going on.
So I bring to you a blagger's guide to the 2010 World Cup, covering the basics of what you need to know and offering a few stock phrases to keep in your conversational arsenal for the summer. So let's kick off...
The Event
Held in South Africa, the first time the competition has hit the African continent. Concerns over safety have been downplayed by official body FIFA but the alarming events at the African Cup of Nations did little to allay fears.
Topics of conversation include questioning the cost of the new stadia versus, well, housing people. Why the grounds have been built away from the Townships where football is an important part of life the heartbeat of many communities. The effects of the high altitude of a number of the grounds (will Peter Crouch's head reach the ionosphere?) and or course the unifying power of sports events and how we all remember the Rugby World Cup bringing the South African nation together in 1995.
The Format
Beginning with eight groups of four teams the first round sees each side play one game against the other in it's group with three points for a win and one for a draw. As hosts South African will kick off. (Italy are the current holders). In the event of tied teams position will be decidedly firstly by the result between the teams themselves and then if that's a draw through a series of factors and if necessary a coin toss would eventually be used to separate the two!
After that it's knockout football complete with extra time (30 mins and no golden goal nonsense) and penalties (someone will cry) all the way to the end. There is also a third/fourth playoff game with traditionally no-one really cares about.
It all starts on Friday the 11th of June and runs through until the 11th of July.
England
Ok, so the England is most likely to be the topic on which you need to be sufficiently armed, well, if you live here anyway.
Under the leadership of Fabio Capello (just call him Fabio) England are currently installed as third favourites with a lot of bookies behind Spain and Brazil (more on them later) and arguably stand a good chance this time around with a bit of luck. This no doubt means it will all fall apart in the first game against the USA.
One of a few teams where all the players are from the domestic league England's raft of Premiership players will be familiar names to many but lets take a quick look a few of them and what you can say about them (and for the 'Heat' minded amongst you their partners too).
Wayne Rooney, England's talisman forward will be the main focus point of England's attack. The balding Man Utd forward is extremely gifted at the game for a portly builder who appears to have accidental been allowed to play. The Shrek look a like has recently become a father with wife Coleen and is coming off the back of a season where his good form almost carried his club to a record breaking title win. There is concern over his fitness as he was troubled by a series of niggling injuries towards the end of the season - i.e he will probably break down within ten minutes of the tournament proper starting. And he may yet smack someone in the face as the red mist descends.
Things to say;
"He reminds of me of Gaza in his prime"
"He's got a great football brain"
"Rooney, Rooney, Roooney!"
"He's our only truly world class player"
Peter Crouch aka Crouchy. The giant stick man who looks like even less like a top flight footballer than Rooney who somehow seems to be really good at scoring at international level (tho' remember to question the quality of the opposition if this comes up) is a good bet to start alongside Wayne in attack. Famous for being tall, once doing the robot after scoring and being well, quite a nice bloke. Also has a vaguely famous ladyfriend in Abigail Clancy
Things to say;
"My god, the lad's tall"
"He's twice the height of Theo Walcott"
"He's got a good touch for a big lad"
"..unlike Emile Heskey"
Emile Heskey is very much an opinion divider. Vital partner for Rooney to play off or lumbering waste of space that never scores and has the first touch of an over enthusiastic dog? Try gauging the opinions of those around before committing to a stance on this. However it is probably safest to ridicule if in doubt.
Things to say;
"He's vitally important as he helps Rooney exploit the space he creates"
"Heskey? Really? *sigh*"
Theo Walcott exploded onto the scene a few years ago and went to the last World Cup as an unplayed squad member. Fast, very fast, very very fast he can easily terrify opposition defences but sadly his passing and crossing is variable and serves between excellent, giving the ball tamely to the opponent or excellent but sadly ten yards ahead of his knackered teammates who couldn't keep up.
Things to say:
"Well Arsene thinks he's good"
"If only he could cross a ball"
"Eventually he'll be a center forward"
"He should be used as a substitute against tiring back lines in the last third of games"
Steven Gerrard and Frank Lampard we'll cover together. Steven (Stevie G) and Frank (Frankie L) are both talismen in the midfield for their club sides, both capable of turning a game around, scoring from the middle of the park and being the engine room of their side through which everything flows. This is great, apart from when they have to play in the same side. On their day both are excellent but the pair are yet to really demonstrate they can really play well alongside each other. Inevitably when they play in the same side one of them will be asked to play a role in which there are less effective, Gerrard typically on the left or Lampard in a more defensive role.
But for some reason Enlgand managers never see this despite the rest of the country doing so, no doubt including Steven's wife Alex and Frank's current beau The One Show's Christine Bleakley
Things to say:
"They really haven't proved the can play well alongside each other"
"Why doesn't Gerrard play for the England the way he plays for Liverpool"
"Lampard's most dangerous when making late runs into the box"
"Gerrard should play in the hole behind Rooney"
"Despite his recent record Lampard is still the best choice for penalty taker"
"It was so embarrassing when McClaren called him Stevie G"
Rio Ferdinand is England's captain and for the most part a reliable full back who can play a bit, but not quite as much as he thinks he can. He runs his own magazine and once tried to be a Jeremy Beadle for a new age but thankfully recently has stuck to the football. However he has recently has trouble with his back and has only played around twenty games for Man Utd. in the season just gone. Just comment that you hope his back stays in one piece and if he makes a mess of things make a crack about his brother having been picked by mistake.
John Terry I suspect you may know all about by now. Usually a rock solid defender in the center the media whirlpool around his indiscretions have seen him be a bit wobbly on the field recently, thought lifting two trophies for Chelsea last month will hopefully have settled him down.
Things to say:
Basically anything about adultery and trying to take any woman he meets to bed.
"Terry will mop up long balls down the center all day long"
Ledley King is a freak of nature. Afflicted by an injury that swells his knee up to three times it's normal size if he trains too much he is only really able to play one game every six days. Which conveniently is the gap between England's games. The freak part comes in when you consider that he is very, very, very good at center back without really training. If Terry or Ferdinand break down, go AWOL or just lose it in someone Ledley will step in.
Things to say:
"Imagine if he could train properly"
"How does he do it?"
Ashley Cole (aka Cashley) is actually, quite possibly the best left back in the world. Seriously. He's solid defensively, has pace to recover if needed and can run up and down the wing to support the attack all day long. He even can regularly cross the ball into the area very well and will occasionally score Dennis Bergkamp like goals. Which is all just as well because it seems that he's a bit of a tool, infamous for throwing his toys out of the pram at Aresnal over the difference of being paid £50,000 a week to £55,000 (hence Cashley) and routinely doing the dirty on (the soon to be Tweedy once again) Cheryl. On the other flank Glen Johnson is where Cole was a few years ago, basically a right winger playing at right back; great going forward, heart attack inducing when defending.
Things to say:
"He's probably the best left back around"
"Thank god Mourinho taught him to defend"
"If only Cole could play right back at the same time"
"Why would anyone cheat on Cheryl?"
David "Calamity" James is the goalkeeper of note that is in the squad, although Joe Hart is the better keeper at the moment so just saying Hart should be playing if he isn't.
Well that's some basics covered for the main players and should be enough to get you through, in terms of the team itself I recommend noting that England are most at home playing a 4-4-2 system but say you would like to see them try a 4-5-1 with Gerrard playing behind Rooney (see above).
Of course say you expect the team to go out on penalties at the quarter finals but a semi final place is more than achievable. Apart from than that learn the words to 'Three Lions'
Well that covers England and I'll move onto some of the other nations and other major players and talking points (offside rules and the interpretation of and the like)soon.
Any questions just ask folks, does anyone want a basic, basic overview at all? I.e what 4-4-2 is? What a center back is? A general football jargon guide?
Tuesday, 25 May 2010
It's gonna get Messi
Ok it's a terrible pun to open with but it could well be true. Everything is set for Lionel Messi to have a big impact at this summer's World Cup (well everything but the Argentine coach)
Messi is player named FIFA Player of the year before the age of 22 and has already broken all sorts of records at his club Barcelona since joining them as a youngster in 2000. At 17 years and 114 days old he made his league debut for Barca' in the 'o5-'06 season and since then he has only got better with each passing year.
And it is in the last couple of years that he has really begun to push on and become the talismanic leader of his club operating often as part of a fluid three man attack. In the season just gone he netted 47 times in 53 appearances and pretty much dismissed Arsenal in the Champions league by himself as he torn the Gunners apart.
Quick, full of trickery and with the ability to pick out killer passes alongside a high level of shooting ability Messi does seem to have it all. But yet it's fair to say despite his excellent recent form he can still be prone to letting himself be marked out of a game (see the Champions Leagues semi final games against Inter) and this that lead to a underwhelming world cup, epically since Maradona's chosen formation doesn't lend itself to Messi's strengths asking him to play deeper down the field.
Still the big players rise to the big occasions and this little man is a big player.
Sunday, 23 May 2010
Brazil, Airport, old school Ronaldo. Classic
A classic World Cup advert, full of the joy of the beautiful game.
Thursday, 20 May 2010
The Drog
With the World Cup fast approaching lets take a look at some of the players who may prove to be the stars of the tournament. First up it's Didier "The Drog" Drogba.
When Drogba first arrived at Chelsea in July 2004 for a fee of £24m it was fair to say that many asked if he was worth that price. Indeed at first it was hard to see anything special about the man from the Ivory Coast.
But after two solid if not outstanding seasons Drogba's third campaign for Chelsea in the '06/'07 saw him score 33 goals in all competitions and finish two scorer in the league. He'd begun to show what he could do with his combination of pace and power; quick to the ball and almost impossible to force off it once he had under control.
A couple of quieter seasons followed as Drogba felt the loss of Mourinho from the club more the most and fell foul to ongoing injury concerns the season after. However in this last season he has once gain regained form and terrorised opponents with a goal haul of 37 in all with an impressive 29 in the league to once again take the Golden Boot.
Yes, he can be petulant and moody (as demonstrated by on his on pitch tantrums and occasional mad moments like that against Barca) but on his day and on his game he appears to be simply unplayable for opponents, able to simply brute force his way to goal, hit screamers from distance (see those FA cup final efforts this year) or trick his way through.
But crucially he is more than a goal scorer, his ability to hold the ball and bring teammates into play can prove vital in close games. It's telling that if you tell people they can have one out of Drogba, Rooney or Torres in their team I find most people will pick the twice African Footballer of the year.
Ivory Coast have a number of good players but if they are to make real progress it will be Drogba that will be the fulcrum and it's his passion that might well steer them through Group G's 'group of death'.
When Drogba first arrived at Chelsea in July 2004 for a fee of £24m it was fair to say that many asked if he was worth that price. Indeed at first it was hard to see anything special about the man from the Ivory Coast.
But after two solid if not outstanding seasons Drogba's third campaign for Chelsea in the '06/'07 saw him score 33 goals in all competitions and finish two scorer in the league. He'd begun to show what he could do with his combination of pace and power; quick to the ball and almost impossible to force off it once he had under control.
A couple of quieter seasons followed as Drogba felt the loss of Mourinho from the club more the most and fell foul to ongoing injury concerns the season after. However in this last season he has once gain regained form and terrorised opponents with a goal haul of 37 in all with an impressive 29 in the league to once again take the Golden Boot.
Yes, he can be petulant and moody (as demonstrated by on his on pitch tantrums and occasional mad moments like that against Barca) but on his day and on his game he appears to be simply unplayable for opponents, able to simply brute force his way to goal, hit screamers from distance (see those FA cup final efforts this year) or trick his way through.
But crucially he is more than a goal scorer, his ability to hold the ball and bring teammates into play can prove vital in close games. It's telling that if you tell people they can have one out of Drogba, Rooney or Torres in their team I find most people will pick the twice African Footballer of the year.
Ivory Coast have a number of good players but if they are to make real progress it will be Drogba that will be the fulcrum and it's his passion that might well steer them through Group G's 'group of death'.
Tuesday, 11 May 2010
Capello picks his men*
*well, some of them will be sent home and some of them might well break down first.
Yep, today Fabio named his provisional 30 man party, which will be whittled down to 23 names who will take part in the summer's World Cup. And here there are:
Goalkeepers: Joe Hart (Manchester City), David James (Portsmouth), Robert Green (West Ham).
No real surprises here, expect James to start against the USA with Green as the first choice backup. Hart has had a good, a very good season but his youth works against him on the international stage and one's very much one for the future.
Defenders: Leighton Baines (Everton), Jamie Carragher (Liverpool), Ashley Cole (Chelsea), Michael Dawson (Tottenham), Rio Ferdinand (Manchester United), Glen Johnson (Liverpool), Ledley King (Tottenham), John Terry (Chelsea), Matthew Upson (West Ham), Stephen Warnock (Aston Villa).
The story here is that Carragher has been persuaded to return to play back up right back, which is why he quit this lark in the first place. King was a shoe in after proving his fitness in the last few fixtures of the season and it seems Fabio has been tracking him and talking to the Spurs physios all year. Hopefully Terry will have stopped being an idiot by July (small hope I know) and Rio's back doesn't fall apart like dry Playdo. Still at least Cashley Cole is one of the best in his position out there (as much as I hate to admit it) , the less said about Johnson defensive awareness the better however.
Midfielders: Gareth Barry (Manchester City), Michael Carrick (Manchester United), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Steven Gerrard (Liverpool), Tom Huddlestone (Tottenham), Adam Johnson (Manchester City), Frank Lampard (Chelsea), Aaron Lennon (Tottenham), James Milner (Aston Villa), Scott Parker (West Ham), Theo Walcott (Arsenal), Shaun Wright-Phillips (Manchester City).
Huddlestone's inclusion is a bit of surprise and it seems he's waiting in the wings to take Barry's place if he fails to pass a fitness test at the end of the month. Lennon, Walcott, Johnson and Wright-Phillips mean there is plenty of pace in the side and we might even get some proper 'old fashioned' wing play. If miracles happen Gerrard and Lampard will suddenly, finally, learn how to play well together for a whole match at a time.
Forwards: Darren Bent (Sunderland), Peter Crouch (Tottenham), Jermain Defoe (Tottenham), Emile Heskey (Aston Villa), Wayne Rooney (Manchester United).
So happy to see Bent get a nod to at least join the initial squad. You have to be in good form to score than often for Sunderland. Sadly I fear he may be the one to lose out since Fabio has a strange fixation with Emile "Goal Machine" Heskey.
If the squad stays fit and they can build momentum in the early games then they could fail heroically in the semi-finals, as all English men should. But if I could wish for a dream end to the World Cup it will be for Crouch to score a last minute World Cup final winner and immediately proceed to do the robot watched by about one billion people.
C'mon Crouchy!
Yep, today Fabio named his provisional 30 man party, which will be whittled down to 23 names who will take part in the summer's World Cup. And here there are:
Goalkeepers: Joe Hart (Manchester City), David James (Portsmouth), Robert Green (West Ham).
No real surprises here, expect James to start against the USA with Green as the first choice backup. Hart has had a good, a very good season but his youth works against him on the international stage and one's very much one for the future.
Defenders: Leighton Baines (Everton), Jamie Carragher (Liverpool), Ashley Cole (Chelsea), Michael Dawson (Tottenham), Rio Ferdinand (Manchester United), Glen Johnson (Liverpool), Ledley King (Tottenham), John Terry (Chelsea), Matthew Upson (West Ham), Stephen Warnock (Aston Villa).
The story here is that Carragher has been persuaded to return to play back up right back, which is why he quit this lark in the first place. King was a shoe in after proving his fitness in the last few fixtures of the season and it seems Fabio has been tracking him and talking to the Spurs physios all year. Hopefully Terry will have stopped being an idiot by July (small hope I know) and Rio's back doesn't fall apart like dry Playdo. Still at least Cashley Cole is one of the best in his position out there (as much as I hate to admit it) , the less said about Johnson defensive awareness the better however.
Midfielders: Gareth Barry (Manchester City), Michael Carrick (Manchester United), Joe Cole (Chelsea), Steven Gerrard (Liverpool), Tom Huddlestone (Tottenham), Adam Johnson (Manchester City), Frank Lampard (Chelsea), Aaron Lennon (Tottenham), James Milner (Aston Villa), Scott Parker (West Ham), Theo Walcott (Arsenal), Shaun Wright-Phillips (Manchester City).
Huddlestone's inclusion is a bit of surprise and it seems he's waiting in the wings to take Barry's place if he fails to pass a fitness test at the end of the month. Lennon, Walcott, Johnson and Wright-Phillips mean there is plenty of pace in the side and we might even get some proper 'old fashioned' wing play. If miracles happen Gerrard and Lampard will suddenly, finally, learn how to play well together for a whole match at a time.
Forwards: Darren Bent (Sunderland), Peter Crouch (Tottenham), Jermain Defoe (Tottenham), Emile Heskey (Aston Villa), Wayne Rooney (Manchester United).
So happy to see Bent get a nod to at least join the initial squad. You have to be in good form to score than often for Sunderland. Sadly I fear he may be the one to lose out since Fabio has a strange fixation with Emile "Goal Machine" Heskey.
If the squad stays fit and they can build momentum in the early games then they could fail heroically in the semi-finals, as all English men should. But if I could wish for a dream end to the World Cup it will be for Crouch to score a last minute World Cup final winner and immediately proceed to do the robot watched by about one billion people.
C'mon Crouchy!
Thursday, 22 April 2010
One of the best I've ever seen..
To continue World Cup build up let us all admire this goal from France '98. For Dennis Berkamp to take a ball under control after it's traveled some thirty yards is impressive. To do it when it's coming over his shoulder is even better.
To then take the defender completely out of the game with his next touch is stupidly good. To then rifle the ball into the net giving the keeper no chance is excellent. To do this all with three touches of the ball is football genius. It is still one of the vest goals I've even seen...
To then take the defender completely out of the game with his next touch is stupidly good. To then rifle the ball into the net giving the keeper no chance is excellent. To do this all with three touches of the ball is football genius. It is still one of the vest goals I've even seen...
Go Go Godzilla.
With the World Cup less than fifty days away excitement continues to build (well it certainly does for me anyway) and I've already picked the team I will support alongside my obvious national inclination.
Yes this year I will be supporting Asia titans Japan! Making their fourth consecutive appearance at a finals the team will be looking to once again progress past the group phase. It will be a tough ask with Cameroon and the Netherlands in their group alongside the Danish but they have a chance.
Shunsuke Nakamura will be the player most familiar to most people having played at Celtic for a number of seasons and the they kick off their campaign against Cameroon on the 14th of June.
So I've ordered the strip, started the research on the squad and coaching staff and noted their match dates. I'm all ready to go.
And that Nakamura can sure take a free kick or two..
Yes this year I will be supporting Asia titans Japan! Making their fourth consecutive appearance at a finals the team will be looking to once again progress past the group phase. It will be a tough ask with Cameroon and the Netherlands in their group alongside the Danish but they have a chance.
Shunsuke Nakamura will be the player most familiar to most people having played at Celtic for a number of seasons and the they kick off their campaign against Cameroon on the 14th of June.
So I've ordered the strip, started the research on the squad and coaching staff and noted their match dates. I'm all ready to go.
And that Nakamura can sure take a free kick or two..
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